Originally Posted By: West
Symptoms included dissasociation, intense flashbacks, vaginal pain, depression, feelings of unworthiness, and a general distaste for sex.


How did you react to these?

I will tell you she doesn't understand this either. She feels like a circus sideshow.

You may get discouraged by hearing this

BUT she needs to decide to get help for these feelings.

You can't make her. You can't fix this with DB either IMHO.

She is still a victim. Now you are the perpetrator.

Until she decides to be a survivor and then a thriver then you are in for a rough road my friend.

Until she decides to look inside she will blame everything on who is standing around on the outside.

It might help (it did for me) to understand what you're dealing with. Have you studied sexual trauma and PTSD enough to know what you're dealing with?

I can definetly tell you from my experience it is almost like two different personalities.

The one you know and are comfortable with and the one she becomes when coping.

The anxiety you feel about which one you'll get can tear you up. It can destroy your relationship.

You must come to grips with something quick West:

You cannot control this. You cannot fix this. You didn't break her and you can't fix her.

For now you must concentrate on detachment. Taking yourself out of the drama that you have allowed yourself to be party to.

I am not knocking you here. You want to help. But many times we fall into roles of Co-dependency.

If this is a new term for you look it it up.

Then be honest with yourself as to whether it applies.

My goal is to some day be the person my dog thinks I am