My mil never called our kids the entire time h was gone, even on their birthdays. Sent cards with money but no contact unless we travelled to see them. 2 years passed.
We reconciled and she acted as if nothing happened and then she got cancer and we cared for her and she died...
at her funeral my two oldest spoke. D said something about how she's "still getting to know grandmother" even after death b/c she did "not know her well" while alive.
This shocked h and his brother and I was dumbfounded...as if mil knew our children well!! How could they not know? Answer...who knows but they didn't.
OMG...but what was the point of me telling him? I believe at some level h's family realizes that our kids are MUCH closer to my family than his b/c my family makes an effort. They talk. My mom is 89 and still visits us. Oh well, mil is gone...no need to cry over spilt milk.
I think my kids will be there for each other and their kids. Lesson learned.
I simply am grateful for those whom she does have in my kids lives, and there are many.
You can increase the number of adults in your kid's lives with coaches and teachers and others...
do what you can and let it go.
Don't keep going to a dry well when you need a drink. You'll always be thirsty.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
