Loving, Listening, and Letting Go..

[aeolianchaos]

Trying to figure out something.

W plans to take the bed because it was a gift from her parents for her bday last year.

Thing is, we got rid of MY old bed to make room for it.

Starting to feel agitated about this - on one hand, its a bed. Who cares.. it isn't a child or even a pet. On the other.. sleeping on an air mattress until I feel like I can afford to buy another bed w/o stressing my finances seems like no fun. There is an argument to be made for her paying me part of the cost since she is also taking the new sofa and the nice rugs. Tough to say... I do want to remain fair and evenhanded, but I feel like I am getting the air mattress, the handmedown chair, and a loveseat we were trying to get rid of a month before the PA was disclosed.

I responded to my W's email today (the one mentioned above) and just asked her "Would you like to talk about something?" I'm tired of having to wonder about what she actually wants so I figure I'll just ask her directly and let her decide whether or not to give me a straight answer. No pressure, no pleading, just asking for clarification. Of course I want the answer to be "yes.. I want to talk about putting the D on hold while I work on my guilt and other issues." But lets face it, the odds of that happening are... whatever they are, but not in my control.