What you need to accept right now is that your W is nuttier than squirrel sh!t. She is all over the place. What she says, does, thinks doesn't make sense to you. It doesn't because you're not in MLC or whatever she's going through.
Detach Tad! Put your armor on and make the choice to STOP letting this crazy sitch get to you. You can not figure her out, STOP trying. She is not the person you married at this time. That person would not have done these things. LET THIS PERSON GO!
Do not be afraid that if you detach that you will stop loving her. You still can love her from a distance. You can still love the person that she was, you are allowed to not like the person that she is right now.
Friends? This is just my opinion on this. Personally, I wouldn't have a friend that kept repeatedly hurting me. Until her venom spewing stops or at least slows down I would make sure I'm not around for her to feed off of.
She keeps using you as fuel Tad. Justification fuel and you stick around and let her. STOP letting her. Be gone, be busy, be working on you. She has to figure herself out. The more time you let her energize herself on you is the less time she has to spend with herself. Cut the fuel line.
Because of your need to keep getting your W fix, the more you're delaying any chance she has to start looking within. She's using you Tad, STOP letting her. It seems from your posts that your W only can go so long without feeding her anger. What if what you're doing is keeping her from having to face herself?
STOP reading into, analyzing everything she says and does. At this point none of it means anything. You keep letting these things wound you. All it is is the ramblings of a person that you don't recognize. Will the person she was, return? Maybe, not for a long time, though.
Tad, you're obviously an intelligent man. Spend your time on you and your kids. Work on you. Figure out why you are so co-dependent that you keep letting you W do these things to you over and over.
I know you keep looking for change in your wife. She won't change until you do.
Dig deep, Tad. Figure yourself out. You get to take this journey sanely. That is a blessing in itself.
Make the choice to be proactive instead of reactive. You can do this Tad.
