XYZ is here longer than I ever imagined....

[MynameisMZ]

X- I used the boards to vent and journal SO MUCH and it really helped....usually.

I re-read my journal from last year and I was SO NEEDY and grasped onto every little good thing he said and did! THEN, there was a point where I re-worked the DB strategies and became positive, fun, carefree again. I liked that concept about focusing on the task at hand. That strategy definitely worked for us. I didn't do any needy stuff around H. He was getting things out of his system and I just rode the roller coaster. He seemed to really respond to my reassurances that I was IN. Things were such a mess, but I said I was committed. We slowly began to work on US and now he uses the US word all the time. It's not about healing ME anymore, it's about healing US and that feels really good. Just hang in there! Stay positive and BE the counter-force from what you both need to heal.

Ironically, we BOTH have been expressing our neediness to each other (in this piecing) and it's all good. That is a level of intimacy we never dared to venture into before. We both felt we had to keep a strong facade up.