Well. Today was interesting. I need to remind myself it wasn't over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor
W asked for insurance cards earlier in the week and I said I'd get them to her Sunday. Sure, I could have just mailed them but I didn't. Plus, I wanted to get a few boxes from her basement. Traded some texts today and we agreed to meet at a bar two blocks from the house.
I pulled up and we weren't sure if the place was open, it was so empty. Showed W my new car, she liked it. I gave her the insurance card and we went in. Not quite empty, but close.
Ended up having two beers each. First beer was small talk. Second beer she brought up R. She point blank asked what we should do about us. Reiterated that I go back and forth, but that I think we should try to slowly work on things. We talked about a lot of things after that, validated each other and we were (or at least I was) pretty matter of fact about things. Told her I was looking for bigger place or storage area. She is looking for no responsibilities and to run away (MLC anyone?).
Thing she likes about OM is that there are no expectations and they'll do spontaneous things together. She also admitted she couldn't be with him long term, and that the spontaneity she originally liked is starting to get on her nerves. She likes that I am responsible, but I know myself (without mentioning it to her) that I need to loosen up sometimes. I'm really not too bad at that.
By the second beer, she had turned towards me so that our legs were grazing. She really went on for a while about my S14, but in a concerned way, about his emotional and social problems. W also mentioned her DD really likes me but thinks W and I are not compatible. I agreed that we weren't right now and that we have had issues through the R. W was vehement that when we first started our R that we were *totally* compatible.
W paid for our drinks and we left for her house. At our cars, she asked again what we should do about our sitch, almost like she wanted me to take charge or something. I casually asked if she wanted to try MC. Turns out that her IC gave her the name of a good MC, but when I went dark on W, she was SO upset and hate filled she tore up the paper. W said she would ask at her IC appointment tomorrow for the name again.
As we were getting ready to go, W asked how my thesis was coming along. I think she lost some respect for me when I put it off for a year. Told her the drama that one committee member is causing (could take up it's own post) ans she seemed pleased that I'm moving forward with it.
So to keep this from turning into a book, I got my boxes from the basement, W picked more veggies from the garden while I hung out with her and she gave me a big hug before I left. I'm glad I waited a day or three before suggesting D myself.
Probably a lot more that I could add, but I save that for the movie version of my life.
Me 43 W 38 M 5 T 7 SD20 S15, S13 with 1st W ILYBNILWY June 2010 Separation/Bomb July 2010 Divorce Feb 8, 2011
