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OMG....

I feel sick with grief for you. Please know you are NOT at fault.

Your wife was ill. No one knew how ill she was.

Many people with this illness take their own life no matter what else others do.


Please be there for your children and make sure THEY know it's not their fault either...


God bless and strengthen you at this time and bring you some peace in your darkest hours...

I'm so sorry 9, I am SO VERY SORRY....

Please let us know if and how we can help you & yours...

((( !! ))))


M: 57 H: 60
M: 35 yrs
S30,D28,D19
H off to Alaska 2006
Recon 7/07- 8/08
*2016*
X = "ALASKA 2.0"
GROUND HOG DAY
I File D 10/16
OW
DIV 2/26/2018
X marries OW 5/2016

= CLOSURE 4 ME
Embrace the Change
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Dearest, dearest Nine...

We cannot ever know how other's think, what life is like in their minds. I have no doubt that you have tried the best way you knew how to love her and be there for her and do what was best for her and your family. That is all any of us can ever, ever do. There is no crystal ball to tell us these things will happen or why or what could have prevented it. You are not to blame. You did all you could do. Often... with people who are suicidal... it's just a matter of time and no one can stop it. Even if you'd been there, even if you'd caught her in an attempt... it would only have been a delay. All you could do... all any of us can do is love our spouses and those dearest to us. Please do not feel that this is your fault. I know this just happened, but you must find a way to let go of any feelings of guilt. I hope you will find a way to fill your heart with love for your W, your family, and yourself and that it will help you find the strength and courage you need to move through this for yourself and your family. Everyone here is sending you loving thoughts and I hope we can manage to be of some aid to you in this time of loss.


Me: 36
Ex-H: 36
Met/friends 9/2000
Fling 5/2002-8/2002
R: 2/2005
M: 8/2/2008
Ex-H online A: 11/2009 (discovered)
Ex-H filed 8/1/2014
D final 10/2015

DS: 19 (mine)
DD: 7 (with Ex-H)
DD: 2 (mine)
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9,

I can't even begin to express the shock I felt reading what you wrote.

I am so, so very sorry that this has happened.

It's times like this where I wish we weren't all in different parts of the world, because more than anything I just want to give you a hug.

You did absolutely everything, everything you could for your W and your M.
Please, do not blame yourself for this.

If there is anything, anything you need at all please let us know.
We are all here for you.


"Everyone you meet has baggage. Find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack."
¤Formerly DelinquentGurl¤
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Nine, I don’t have the words to express this. Sorry through this board doesn’t cut it.

This isn’t on you. Your family needs you. You need your family. Take time, you need it, they need it.


BITS
Me 55, ACK, when did that happen? Doesn't feel like 55
D 30
S 27

You create your own universe as you go along - Winston Churchill
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9

I am very sorry to hear of your unimaginable loss. There are NO words that anyone can say that will take this pain away. Just know that she is in a better place now and that her pain is over.

I truly believe that Death is not an ending, but a beginning, so this is not goodbye, it is merely so long, until we meet again...

My prayers are with you and your family...

Johnnie


Me 45 W 34 W.A.W.
3K. D11 S9 D6
M 12 y T 13 y
Bomb drop 02/22/2011
2nd written bomb (Letter bomb) 05/31/2011
Affair (A bomb) revealed 07/03/2011
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((((9)))) Nobody is to blame for her illness, least of all...you. My heart goes out to you and the boys. So, so very sorry this happened. You are in our prayers.


It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
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9,

This won't even come close to what I am feeling.

Definitely not close to what you are feeling.

I can't believe I just posted what I did. I feel like a dick.

I hadn't seen your post.

9, I am so sorry.

I can't believe this. I just broke down trying to type this.

I don't know what to say.


BITS

Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.
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9 - I've been contemplating what to write to you since I first saw your post several hours ago. I don't pretend to have any idea of how you are feeling right now, but there are so many of us keeping you and your children in our prayers right now. We all know you have the strength to get through this, even though the road will be the longest and toughest one traveled so far. You are an incredible father and an incredible man, and your children are very blessed to have you right now and always. Be there for them, and let them be there for you.

Godspeed. (())


H:36 W:34
M:6y, T:14y
S:5, S:2
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Just popping in again to let you know I've been thinking about you and your kids all night.
I said a prayer for all of you, and will continue to do so.

Again, so very sorry.


"Everyone you meet has baggage. Find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack."
¤Formerly DelinquentGurl¤
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I have never been a wordsmith.

I just wish I could say something that meant dick. I've never even met you. And here I am balling.

I guess I'll just say this. My parents are here this weekend. My mom caught me crying and asked why.

I told her about you.

About everything you have done.

The strength you have shown. The compassion. The love.

I'm not sure you realize it. You are [censored] special man. What you have done. What you have committed yourself to. The love you have shown. Unbelievable.

I'm babbling.


BITS

Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.
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