life, Many mlcers will not file and one of the reasons is that the spouse will leave them alone and not put pressure on them to face reality. Some file immediately because they think the spouse is the reason that life is so hard and also as a way to back us up to leave them alone. Others will file further alone because it's just too darn hard to fix things. They do not want to do the work. We can't determine who will file right away and who won't. The actions are so totally different for each one of them. The only thing that we can do is focus on ourselves, children and finances.
As for mlcers sitting down and discussing finances, I've not found that to be the case in many instances. They walk out the door and leave the financial situation with the spouse. If one does sit down and discuss finances, etc., you better mark it on the wall because they don't care in the beginning.
Whatever you decide to do, you must follow through. Threats are not something that they take lightly and trust me, if you don't follow through, they'll continue their bad behavior over and over again.
Do what you must do in order to survive and live your life to the fullest. Protect your assets and watch the bills to ensure that they are paid (if this is something he has agreed to do).
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
