This may seem like a stupid request, but I’m looking for advice on how best to stay on topic when discussing issues with a spouse who is really hurt.
Most people when describing communicating, refer to it as talking.
Think about it. Not listening, but talking. Like listening is secondary and meaningless. Like most people are just waiting their turn to talk (about what THEY are interested in or what's important to them) instead of listening to what interests or is important to the other person.
Work on listening with your wife, in fact? Do your best NOT to talk, unless it is to encourage her to keep talking.
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I’d also like your advice on what to say when you’ve hurt someone repeatedly…….besides sorry. I’ve said sorry so much, it has no meaning.
Herb, it doesn't; not anymore. Come a time when saying sorry just means I acknowledge my bad behaviour, but it isn't going to prevent me from doing it again.
Right now? You're saying sorry to make yourself feel better, not her.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
