It's been curious, actually. Work is starting to spin up for the new school year (class starts... in an hour or so!) and being in front of students is generally good for me. I've had more time for hobbies (dancing/improv) since my folks left, though I miss them.
Generally, my mental outlook has been pretty good. I did have a day of 2hrs sleep, but I didn't wake up depressed and lonely--I just couldn't sleep. Had a conversation with my law office yesterday (sworn financial statement) and that process usually drags me into a depressive spiral, and it just didn't this time. So detaching seems to be going well. Was able to flirt playfully with a friend (not a romantic prospect or serious flirting) without feeling depressed.
So all that is good... but none of it involves fixing my marriage, which probably means I've given up trying, and that's sad. It's just that I don't know what I could possibly do; I'm doing great work on myself, but I can't make my W care about that. And I really feel like I've given up on the legal institution of marriage, and that makes me sad too (I have not given up on love, affection, or even long-term relationships, but in the years-from-now even that I marry again, I'm getting an iron-clad prenup).
So... doing as well as could be expected under the circumstances, and probably a good deal better than that. Very disappointed in my W, and that probably is not going to change. I was interested that part of the early D proceedings may involve getting a professional to evaluate her situation and determine how employable she is to see if she's dragging her feet on getting a job... which I'm guessing, what with the three masters' and all-but-done PhD, is going to be a wakeup call for her that just cashing my checks and taking vacations to see her sister might not be the best course of action.
And hey, maybe she'll wake up before time runs out. But right now I just really want my life and my income back instead of having both of them held hostage by someone I no longer remotely understand.
