Just Be

[Denver_2010]

I will respect your wishes Denver.

But I DO understand your position, it is no different than anyone else's...

I can understand why my statement 'move on' upset you. Your W has been saying it for 8 months and you just won't. You just didn't.

You have come to the DB board but you don't DB... I truly believe that had you DB'ed for any length of time you and your W would be in a better place, and still could be. But I understand you don't need my opinion.


Boundaries are not my 'philosophy'. They are part of DB.


Anyway, it appears your way is working for you.


Good luck...

SBH Out...

Your sarcasm doesn't go unnoticed SBH.

Your statement to 'move on' didn't upset me SBH. That is a very valid opinion on my situation. What I don't want to get into here any longer is what is and what isn't an 'affair' ... nor do I want to get into a convo on how out of M R's with OPs should never be tolerated. Every situation is different.

Boundaries are a part of DB, but only if they are used correctly. I haven't done it correctly in the past. We can debate whether or not I should have done this or that... and when I should have done this or that... all day.

The bottom line is that I am where I am.

AND, I will say that even if others think that I should have drawn a line in the sand long ago, I KNOW that I have given my W a long look at some serious changes in myself that she would not have had a chance to see if I had not spent as much time with her as I have over the past several months.

For the most part, she saw a Denver that is much different than the Denver she left. Not everything that needs to be changed with Denver has been... but a lot has. She saw it, she acknowledges it, and hopefully, it will give her something to think about as time goes by.

Will I still be there if that happens? I don't know any longer. I am trying to move on with my life the best that I can as if she will not be a part of it. I'm going to let her live her life so that she can figure her issues out.

I simply don't want to debate whether or not she is having an affair or whether or not I should have or should be setting some sort of boundary.

Denver