Just Be

[Harrier]

I hesitate to post because you probably won't like what I'm going to say but here goes.

You are losing respect for yourself and your M with your dalliance.

Granted your W hasn't shown you much, but since time you simply haven't given her that chance. You've been in her face numerous times asking for her to make a decision. She wants time. You can't even respect that. How can she trust you with your other "changes?"

You have been doing this for what 7 months tops. She had to live with years of you hurting her, from her point of view. I say this not to keep score but for you to understand where she is coming from. You can't fix that in a few months.

So then what is your reaction to it. You do the EXACT thing that she did to hurt you so much. You found yourself a playdate. I don't know if it was for ego, or companionship, or to get back at her or because you really connected with the OW. But the point is you went back on your word, you were deceitful and dishonest about it.

The OW seems to have something going on. I think you rightfully called out the OM because he was pursing a married woman. Yet this is what your OW is doing pursing a married man.

Now all this stuff about boundaries is just words...for both of you.


The whole "just be" speech should have been without the presences of the OW. Now R is impossible for both of you with the presence of OPs.

I dunno. It's your life and your consequences. I do hope you find peace and find it for the right reasons.