Can my relationship be saved?

[a girl]

Clarification - he's not living with OW.

OW lives 2500 miles away, and given the legalities of custody and minors in both of our states, the soonest they could live together would be 2 years - and given her conviction for domestic assault, it could be even longer.

I'll respond to the rest later.

[a girl]

Having a hard time this afternoon. Got four emails from H, all around various divorce things - our house refi, splitting up our checking account, a divorce mediator, and some canisters he wants from the kitchen.

Very hard to find my center right now.

[NTX_Dad]

Do you have any co-workers or friends you could have a quick drink with after work?

I have a pretty religious co-worker that's always available for a chat and it makes me feel better every time.

[Forrest Gump]

So how are you handling things? Why do you think he is sending so many emails? Are you seeing the theme is his actions yet?

[a girl]

Well, in all honesty, I haven't had enough time at my desk to respond to any of the emails. I'm planning to send one email responding to all emails, as that's easier for me.

I honestly have no idea why he's sending more emails - I would assume because he's trying to get the divorce process rolling.

[LearningPatience]

AG,
my guess as to why he's sending more emails is to keep the communication channels open. A lot of the WAS are like teenagers, they don't want you around but secretly (even to themselves) want your love and attention.

It's probably not even worth trying to figure out why he's sending more emails. I think you are right to send one response back, just make it as short and business like, without being rude, as you can.

[a girl]

Thanks, LG.

Here's what I sent:
"Sorry I've not responded to anything yet - we had a critical database failure that I've been tied up with.

Canisters - I'm fine if you take them; I'd like to try to find a replacement, though, for the sugar/flour ones. Maybe you can take the rest for now?

Bank Account - can we keep it as is for a bit? Through the refi and whatnot? I trust us to not randomly spend all the money.

Divorce Mediator - Sounds fine to me, I don't think we had any big disagreements on stuff.

Hey, when you took the hotel pans on Saturday, you took the package of S7's brown lunch bags - can you bring them back when you drop him off tonight?

Thanks!"

It felt friendly but not overly chatty.

Thoughts?

[a girl]

Thanks. I didn't agonize too much over it, but I did want to be "business-like" without being rude.

[a girl]

Continuing in my GAL pursuit, I've decided to start working out every evening except Fridays. It really helps take my mind off things - in the 40 minutes I spent on the treadmill tonight, I watched television and H didn't enter my mind once. It was quite nice.

I also hear it helps you sleep better and helps stabilize your mood. My moods are much less all over the place, but still a bit wonky, so anything that helps would be nice.

We're coming up on the first week of H only seeing S7 M, W, and overnight Friday. He can call to wish him goodnight on T, Th and Sun, but not see him. Not sure it will make much of a dent as I usually did all the "after work" stuff with S7, but there is a part of me that hopes that he misses S7.

[~ kd ~]

nope... couldn't do it... I was just gonna let it go...


but...

I just HAD to grab a 100 reply in a topic! lol!

I think it's time to lock this one down...