Oh, one other thing I should mention is that he said something in the car about how I "yelled at him for two years" - and I said, "I think that sounds like one side of the story." I said, "You've been mean to me for two years." He said, "That's b/c you yelled at me for two years." Then I said, "It was b/c you were mean to me."
(It wasn't wholly serious - but that's all that got said).
The other thing which is something I wanted to ask you guys about is -
One of my 180s is that I want him to know that i think it's okay if he wants to go to one of his raves or ride a motorcyle or even buy one. That I used to get really crazy about that stuff b/c I was so immersed in baby-dom with D and I would freak out if he wanted to go to an all-night rave, or buy a moto - but now i feel like - heck if I care - just be a dad and stick around and be a partner - be a happy partner -
At one point, our convo allowed me to say this to him in an indirect way - he was talking about something and I said, "Why don't you just get a motorcyle" - I think he knew something was up with my saying that - but whatever - so he was like "I can't afford one right now."
Which was an odd thing to say b/c all day he talked about buying a boat or a helicopter (all moto replacements) but then tonight he did say he'd been thinking about buying one.
But that is my question - does that seem like I'm throwing myself at him?
I don't know how to communicate to him that I know I was wrong about that stuff in the past - not "wrong" but that i was pretty overprotective and now I just want him to be happy (I mean, i always did - I just didn't realize what a big deal that stuff was - the same way, say, he may not have recognized what a big deal Italy is to me) - I just imagine us in a R where each of us get our own time and what we need to be the people we are, but in our R we are happy b/c we feel "free" -
