Standing for my live-in MLC'er/WAS

[angel61]

Hi Alb,

I am just thankful for the advantages of H being home, mainly that is being provide D12 with 2 parents. He is still very much a good Dad, and takes care of her very well. He also takes care of his responsibilities, such as the household finances, the bills, the trash in the same old perfectionist manner he always had.

I feel though that he does make it a point to show that he is unhappy at home or when he is with me, as contrasted to when he is out . Not all the time though - lately we had some fun times. He does seem to like planning things so that on weekends we get to go somewhere, not stuck at home together which sometimes stil feels awkward.

For me, the detachent is really so important. I could not survive without being detached. Usually I am successful, but once in a whle, I can't help but think thoughts like: I want to know where he is with OW. I know they still talk and text; but I keep wondering what he tells her, what kind of relationship they have, is she waiting for him to one day leave us (which I feel will not happen, that even he does not consider in the near future) or merely content to be an OW?

But also, if he is staying, and he has said in so many ways and acts like he is, even planning house projects with me, and trips in the future - why does he seem not to want to even try to really reconcile in the true sense of the word? Why does he seem to be holding back? I know he cares, the way he takes care of me, but it seems like he won't even admit it to himself. Will he ever do so?