as far as splitting of assets, through mediation or the courts the idea is a 50/50 split. by rushing it, or telling you to lawyer up, she's trying to scare you into giving up more than you have to.
make a list of your assets, what you both have, including accounts, cars, RV, etc. put a value on it. dont agree to anything if you're not comfortable with it. once the papers are signed, theres no going back.
get a legal separation agreement done which would prevent her from draining the accounts. all splitting of the financials are from the time the separation agreement is signed. if she spends it all after that, then she's still liable for that money. any new debt would be hers also.
i owned my condo before we were married, it was considered premarital property. x was not entitled to any of it, other than any appreciation during the marriage.
you'll have to decide what you're willing to give up and live without. some things are worth less than the fight you'd have to keep them. its negotiation, its give and take.
the courts want 50/50 custody, thats always in the best interest of the children. be careful not to give her any reason to argue you are an unworthy parent. there are some horror stories.
its good practice to keep a diary of everything here on out.
i gave up money that i regret, but ultimately its not important.
put a clause in your agreement that would prevent her from moving away. i have a 30 mile limit. if she decides to move further then its her decision and she would give up her custody time.
"In a ham and eggs breakfast, the hen is involved, but the pig is committed".
