Waiting to PIECE. No PEACE when waiting

[ninelives]

so i picked her up. We all looked very dapper. She looked stunning in her dress. I told her so and she brushed it off and doesnt like when i compliment her looks. We did the memorial with the music, a glitch or two but other wise well done. she commented on how good i looked in my suit. Her brother commented on what a beautiful family when we walked into the church. The same brother that was getting along so well with OM last month when he helped him move some of her stuff from my place. Quick change of tune from him. anyway.

We hung out a little and she did her rounds as one of the family. When it was over, we all went back to her sisters. Then there was a lull before people would come over for a bbq. There was a bike rallly about 30 min that i committed to. I told her I would be back in one hour and she said, please make sure you come back. |I said i would be back in one hour. She texted me while i was gone saying she didnt feel comfortable there without me and to please hurry back. I did, just that. When i came back in one hour, she was gone back to her place for a nap which was ok by me. There wasnt anything really happeninig at this point

I went home and changed and then came back and she was not back yet. She showed up about 10 minutes later and i was just being myself , trying to be a host for the out of towners.\

I had a long talk with her niece who shared our anniversary, which was the next day btw. She told me that I was nuts if i would take her back and so did her other niece by marriage. They both told me she blamed me for everything in our marriage and that she is so unstable that i am a good guy and not to take such a risk on their aunt. BTW, the age difference between the nieces and my w is about 5 years. Anyway, I told them that our marriage was worth one more shot and went on to basically tell them about Db and this site and what it stands for. They seemed to come around to the concept but are both skeptical that their aunt will trully come around and be healthy as my wife.

The rest of the night was challenging as there was the ususal dysfunction with this group. My Bil hates her brother and there was the usual tension between them two and accusations of leeching beer etc. silly stuff to say the least. My Bil then accused my W of taking some of his beer to give to her brother from his fridge. This set her off and she was upset for awhile.\\
I was asked to get some chairs from my boat and good thing i was. \My bilge pump wasnt working and my boat was basically sinking at the marina. I was lucky, asked my BIL to get his truck and then we pulled it out after much bailing.

Got back to memorial and the bil that was helping me was upset that party was still going on. Somebody grabbed a guitar and they were singing, including my wife and i . I was having a decent time, went to my place to grab some booze for the others so BIL would not complain about his booze being decimated. Then BIL wanted everybody gone, I offered my place and my W echoed that and said we should go back to our place. ( not 9's) Freudian slip maybe?

Everybody liked my place as \i just got it cleaned and W was showing off her vines that were doing very well covering the pergola. Her idea. she was treating my place like hers which was ok by me.

Then close to midnight, she had a bit of a meltdown and was cold and a little bitchy. She wanted to leave about 11:54. I said to her , wait for 6 more minutes and she said, why because its our anniversay? I said, yes, that would be nice and she was quiet for a while. She noticed clock at 12:03 and said , happy 18th anniversary and gave me a hug.

Everybody had left by then and it was just me , wife and kids and we took little guy to my bedroom, she came along too and i massaged her for about an hour. She was very recepive to my touches.

I asked her to stay and she said no. Time to go. |I said ok, but it would be nice if you stayed with no excpectations for our anniversary. she said she would stay tomorrow as we would be leaving on monday for southern ontario to visit my parents in the hospital. I said that would be fine and said ok good night and asked for a kiss, ( i know bad move and it was) She said no thanks and gave me a peck on the cheek. I said, now thats not a kiss, one of the lips please and she refused. I know it was silly on my part for that , BAD BAD nine.

I walked her to the van and no kiss further.


Next day, \i did not text her or talk to her. She texted me and wanted to go to her nephews with the group. I said i wasnt sure if i wanted to go. Why not she said. I want to give you some space. Cant we just go as a family. This was all via text.

I drove by her place, she was out front watering and waved me over. I did and we were both quiet. She asked if i was mad at her and i did some more bad DBing. JUst confused i said, whats the big deal about a kiss, i said and immediately regretted it.

She started to cry and said i was pushing her way too much. I apologized and she contiued to cry and said that she wanted to take things more slowly. I agreed. after some nice talk.

We went and had a nice time. He lives on the water and i keep my kayaks there so i went for a nice ride. She came over later to watch our sunday show true blood and we held hands during the entire show and i then massaged her legs throughout. She has fantastic legs. We then went back to our (my room) and i continued with the massages. Youngest son with us the whole time. We talked about our anniversary whether we should in fact count it as our 18th since it was so nuts and she said we were never divorces so it should count.

She stayed the night where i massaged most of the night and we did spoon and had a nice night. In the middle of the night, I got up and slept on the couch but then came back.

I find reporting this to be very tiring so i will complete later. Much more to say.

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