New to the forum.

[Lonely in SLC]

I just want to thank everyone for helping me get through this night. I know I have a lot of thinking to do. To be honest, I know what I want, and that is to get back with my wife, but at the same time I'm not sure how long I can wait. My feelings lately have been changing from depression to anger towards the stbxw. This cannot be healthy for ones mind.

This roller coaster of highs and lows is tough. The mood swings can shift at a moments notice with just a smell of some perfume, a glance at a show we watched together, or a thought of how great things used to be. But then I try and force myself to pick out the positives.

I know that I really need to focus on myself right now. Try to become a better person. Some days I just don't feel like it. But I guess that is where courage and strength come in. It is doing what is right even though it is tough. I'm sure that down the road when I look back at this low in my life from a peak in the future, I will be grateful for this experience. I will be a better person, and my family will benefit from this.

I have learned that trials is where an individual grows the most. I guess one cannot truly know what happiness is without understanding sorrow. I believe it also teaches us empathy towards others. Again, thank you brothers and sisters here on the board. You have been a great help. I hope that I can return the favor to others.