Hey T. Whether this is your field or not, whether you talk to a thousand women who have gone through it, it's tough stuff. Hard to get your mind around.
I've been around a long time. I stay around to help in any way I can because I would not have made it through without many of the people who are posting to you now.
You will get amazing support from the people on here. And we understand what you are going through because we have walked it.
But it is best to not limit yourself to the help of others by only listening to those going through it now or those who have reconciled.
Now as much as I know you want to be able to put this into a simple diagnosis, it cannot be. And the reason is, you cannot possibly know what your wife is feeling.
While it is important to try to understand MLC, it's really not possible to fully understand it unless you've had one.
So, I feel it's best to begin to learn what you need to do in order to survive it.
And you can do that without putting a label on it and evaluating it.
I know that you are angry and confused and hurt. The rug was pulled out from under you. Those are all normal feelings.
You are going to be going through your own steps on this journey. Steps very similar to the grieving process. Disbelief, anger, etc.
It is important to work through each one. And then it is equally important to let it go. Especially anger. You will find it saps your energy and eventually weighs you down.
It is also important not to be reactive. Sit with something for a day before saying it or acting on it.
T, you have some decisions to make. If you decide to stand, it aint for the faint of heart. It's a tough road to walk.
If you decide that this is the path you are going to take, then, it is best to accept that this is a journey she was meant to go on. And if you love her unconditionally, you need to let her take it.
