WAW, not sure how to proceed...

[Jen_Jam]

Hey DM

I almost thought you were my H for a bit! I'm a former LBS who has now become a WAW. My H and I are having and in-house separation right now, where he is in the spare room. It relieves some of the pressure from me.

My H would never make arrangements for our social life. I ended up being the cook, accountant, social organiser, cleaner, PA .. you name it ... all while he sat about not really planning anything at all. I've made the arrangemnts for ALL our wedding anniversaries, while he contributed a v little.

I can't say what's going on in your W's mind, but my mind is FULL of resentment. I really wanted him to step up and be a man, to take more control, I begged for it for about 3 years, but nothing worked. I would still love him to do so, but right now each time I look at him i want to kill him (which ain't good). I just need a bit of space to calm down, then i want to see him making small, regular and consistent changes. I don't want to see him giveup at the first hurdle. My biggest fear is that I take him back, he lets out a big sigh of relief, stops trying to change and reverts back to lettimg me do everything again.

Am I testing him? In a way, but I'm SO sick of asking him to change, then him paying a bit of lip service to it for a week or two then me having to ask again. I'm not his mother. I don't have kids and never wanted them. I feel like I'm married to one though and it breaks my heart. I want to be looked after sometimes too. I'm not superwoman