Respectfully, I do not disagree with blocking the texts or anything that allows you to rest and gain perspective Tad. Seriously. I know exactly where you are/have been. I've been there amigo. Every word, every step with the exception that mine didn't even leave the bedroom for three months after I told her I wouldn't fight her about getting a divorce any longer. She moved out several months after that. In part, I believe, to protect herself from me going after her for her child support. That's the extent of what some will go to.
The rest? Exactly. Still going on now. I got served over a week ago, and she is still trying to pick a fight. Go figure.
When she left, she did very similar stuff. You lost weight. You look great. You should change those pants for these. We will always be friends. You're a bastard! You're an as****le!. This is the best thing for me. I want to move on and be happy. I never loved you. I will always love you.
Tad, the list of things she said/did go on. She "said" many things and she "did" many things. Much was counter to the other.
One thing: she did communicate how she felt at that moment in time...sometimes. Still tries.
I don't listen, not because I don't care Tad. Not because of the divorce. But because she is only trying to hurt me. She even tries to use the kids to hurt me. I won't allow that at any cost. She still tries.
Why? Who the hell knows Tad? I love a good mystery as much as the next guy, but I can't solve this one. Not gonna happen.
My therapist, when I was seeing one, mentioned to me once: you will be long done and then she will decide what she wants.
Know what? She was right. But know what else? That haunted me for a very long time. I am now able to see it though. I am ready to understand what she meant. I am ready to face many of the the other thins exW did along the way that I previously wasn't Tad.
Know what else? I changed focus to me and I am quite happy about that. Once I was able to reduce the conversation and realize that a normal and healthy person doesn't attack like this feral dog of a woman (notice I didn't say b**ch things became much clearer. I say that to answer your question about putting a label on the situation such as MLC. Too much debate as to what that means. But are they crazy? You bet your sweet a** they are! AT LEAST TOWARD YOU they are. And that is what matters. That is why you need to put the distance between you and let her go. You are radioactive to her. You didn't have to do anything to her, but you are getting the blame regardless. I'd say that makes her radioactive toward you as well.
You can not do anything right in her eyes right now.
The repeating? Check. Still happens now if I let it. I control that much like I control my reactions when dealing with a 4 year old. It reminds me often why I mention that it's like my exW had an emotional stroke.
Be good amigo! Think about the perspective.
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
things became much clearer. I say that to answer your question about putting a label on the situation such as MLC. Too much debate as to what that means. But are they crazy? You bet your sweet a** they are! AT LEAST TOWARD YOU they are. And that is what matters. That is why you need to put the distance between you and let her go. You are radioactive to her. You didn't have to do anything to her, but you are getting the blame regardless. I'd say that makes her radioactive toward you as well. 