And the beat goes on...

[Telemark]

Thanks, luvmyhubby. Today I am more at peace with what is happening. Last night W and I talked a lot about what happened over the last 11 years, and in particular the last 5 months, that brought us to this point. W said she could not deal with the tension in our home anymore. She also knew I was snooping and monitoring her communications and that really put her over the edge. I apologized for that and told her she deserved better.

She said she is scared to death of moving out; she can barely afford the new place, still has to buy a washer & dryer and new furnishings, and SS21 (her youngest who is severely autistic) will not take the change well. She also knows she will need to take more time to care for him. Her temper has become more volatile in the last few months, and she has had several verbal fights with her XH and his W; they have indicated they will not help her if she gets into a bind with her share of responsibility for SS21. She has a very difficult road ahead of her. We ended up crying and hugging each other.

I realized last night that us trying to live under the same roof was making a bad situation worse. I think you are correct in saying this may be the best for both of us. While we were still together it was extremely difficult for me to truly detach, and I frequently slipped back into the old destructive ways. I am looking forward to reinventing myself without tiptoeing around my W.