New to the forum.

[Lonely in SLC]

Detaching is hard. Going back to Tuesday, my depression hit so hard that I did not go into work. I called in saying that I was sick. I just did not feel like getting out of bed all day.

I believe my stbxw had some suspicions, so she txted me inviting me over for dinner with the kids. I have not had a home cooked meal in awhile. (I now would like to learn how to cook, maybe take some classes). Anyway, I just txted back saying "No, but thanks for the invite."

Yesterday, she had to drop by my office to sign some paperwork for selling the housed. She arrived with the kids around 05:00. When all of the paperwork was signed I quickly said "Well, that's everything, thanks." She got all upset and told the kids "Let's go kids, Daddy is kicking us out." I politely responded that I was not, that she could stay and talk if she wanted to. I knew she would not take me up on this. She left.

Here is my question. When I try to detach from her and not engage in long conversations, I must come across as mad. She can tell I am not acting normally, which means something is wrong, then gets mad at me. Is her getting mad at me the right thing? I feel that I should be charitable towards her regardless of what she is doing, the higher road so to say; (I will post more about this later). Or should I just not care if she gets mad. If I don't want to talk to her, so be it.

I still have a hard time believing this is all happening. Just 5 months ago I thought we had the best marriage. When do I wake up?