New to the forum.

[Lonely in SLC]

Time is going by fast. It was a holiday weekend here in Utah, celebrating when the pioneers arrived. I finished moving into my new temporary apartment. I signed a six month lease. Part of Plan B, which I will get to later. I know you were asking Sandi2.

I had the kids all weekend. This is probably why I have not signed in recently. I don't like to be on the computer when my kids are over, I would rather be playing with them. We spent a lot of time at the pool, shopping (stuff for apartment), and watching movies. Having young kids is great. You get to experience all of your favorite old movies again like Indiana Jones and Batman from the 80's.

My wife helped me all last week buying stuff and moving into the new apartment. Friday we all went to have dinner at Olive Garden. Since then she has been moody again. Didn't hear from her much Saturday - Tuesday.

House sold. Yeah! It was only on the market for two weeks. We both will get some cash that will help. I am just lucky that I was not underwater on the mortgage like so many.

Now on to some of my thoughts. I am really starting to get angry with my wife. She is a perfectionist, and when things don't go her way, or if I forget something, she gets very upset and critical that at times leads to her yelling. Unfortunately, this was how she has always acted. She claims it is a part of who she is, having Italian ancestors in her family tree.

I believe this is why I began to ignore her in the first place and stopped helping out with the house chores. Instead of being thankful, she would get mad at something I missed. During the last few years, I began to argue back, which escalated to yelling matches. There were just a handful of times that I said some mean things. I just lost patience.

It appears to be happening again. I am tired of her getting mad at me about every little thing. She claims it is the stress of everything. I told her on Monday night that this has happened for 11 years, stress is only an an accuse. The worse part is that it was never directed at the kids where now it is.

Now onto my plans. I have a couple of options and would love to get input. My first thought is to not really do anything for six months, see if our relationship improves and if I see hope. If not, in six months I move on. I begin dating, buy a new house, and live my life.

The other option is to begin dating shortly after the divorce is final, which should be any day now. I have some worries, but I also see some benefits. I am definitely not ready for any long term relationship with anyone. This wound and scar runs deep and will take time to heal. But dating I believe will help me with my self esteem and GAL. I also secretly wonder if it will make the STBXW jealous.

Sandi2,

I also wanted to thank you on your last comment. It helps put things in perspective again. I was just wondering if these where little steps by the W in the right direction for the future. But your right, she needs to work hard in the future if she wants me back. It is all about the chase, right.