i guess, because, we had a nice time last night (my perception of course) and when he dropped us off after i missed him (and felt yucky)
i wondered why he couldn't see that we are a family and belong together (i am not looking for an answer to that one)
i wondered why i still got butterflies when i looked at him, that he didn't feel the same way
i felt yucky because the days are long, the nights are longer and still somewhat empty
and now he's gone, there's just the thought of him
true, does that answer your question? because i just realized that maybe i am not comfortable yet rebuilding the friendship
because when he would look at his phone, i would wonder who it was
because when he looks at me now, i feel like he feels nothing (but it did get a response when the boys were checking me out, and he felt it was uncool because he was with me)
i do think he told me that to make me feel good tho
i am subjecting myself to his company because some part (ok, a big part) of me wants my marriage back
and because he is not in the same place i am
he is done, he has said it
so i am letting that relationship go in hopes of building another
and that has to start with a friendship
does this answer anything?
it is helping me clarify
and you should know this about me true, i would never be in a relationship at the cost of anything
