The bully was an analogy. Used so you could draw an example between her not trusting your immediate changes.
You are very literal. : )
What happened to you to give you that...martyr complex thing. The "whole waste of time". I guarentee no one here said that. That came from you. Its almost a defense mechanism.
No one gets it to a T. Too much conflicting ideas and to be honest, you could do everything perfectly by the book and all that does is gives you a chance, not a guarenteee.
If my tone, in anyway comes across as aggresive? Or mean-spirited? Or anything like that...that simply is not the case. Challenging? God I hope so. But it serves no purpose to get you so upset you don't want to be here.
I WANT you and your wife to find out that your marriage is worth it and can become something so much better than either of you have every thought possible.
So does Starsky.
The early defintion of success, they one you want when you first come here? The people who made it through and are married? That's Starsky as well.
However, I view Starsky as a success NOT because he is married. But because he grew strong from this, he rebuilt himself into a better, father, friend, husband, brother, and son.
We cannot fix other people. We can however fix ourself.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
