If you are just venting / journaling / trying to "make sense"... that's great...
Understand that to many of us here, it is coming across as obsessing...
If that's not the case, then great...
How we "process" the past, the now, and the possible futures... to each our own... it needs to happen...
many of us, which is what's suggested strongly in DB is... while we are processing, we GAL, we 180, we move forward and detach...
processing continuously makes detaching real hard... maybe if you process in chunks... between the more often occasions of GALing and other of life's duties... it might help you...
it's all good... your journey will be as unique as any other here on this board...
