I can take that punch!

[Redo]

JS, SF: Thank you for your feedback.

Yup, i really need to first figure out my life before venturing again into R's. One of my biggest regrets has been that i was hitched at 23 before i even got a chance at figuring out myself. This is my chance and i cannot afford to waste it.

Journaling...

Visited daughter this weekend. She was having an eye exam and i wanted to be there.

It was weird. All 3 of us went to the doctor. We drove in the same car. It felt like we were family again. For that moment, all that crazy feelings i was having about this other person just evaporated.
Things wenr really good at the doctor's office. Although we found that daughter will end up wearing glasses. W was lil worried that D will end up with glasses forever. Had to calm her a bit that it might be a temporary thing.

Daughter was sick that day and so when we came back she just went to sleep. I too was scheduled to drop off my car at repair shop that evening. So i left early.

While driving back, car developed a problem. I was getting worried that i might get stuck on the highway. Called up FIL. He's a car mechanic. I always took his advice when it came to car stuff. He was giving me tips on what might be wrong etc. It felt like old times. It felt weird when i called him and told him about the car. It was also nice of him to call back and inquire if i made it back.

All in all it was good visit. Wife did tell me that if i wanted i could take daughter when the next 3 day weekend comes. I told her i would wait a lil longer as i am not yet ready to take care of her as a single dad.

Sometimes i get this feeling if she's waiting for a long apology from me. But i have done enough apologizing. I feel that i am trying to be there for my family even though she has decided to break it up. I need to keep my self respect at some point.

I think i am just gonna give it more time before i open up myself to other people. Meanwhile I'll just love to live with myself.