Well, last night with the folks in town and today I got the "response to petition for dissolution of marriage" from my lawyers to sign and notarize. So pretty rough day, and couldn't get hold of some of my supporters so going to have a hard time sleeping.
Actually that's not true. I have a hard time calling some of them up when I'm low because of course when you're low, you feel like you shouldn't burden anyone with it. But I'll have to get over that.
What my gut wants me to do is cocoon in the house and isolate myself, so I'm going to have to take an even more active role in getting out of the house. I guess tomorrow I'll call one of the (platonic-friend) women in the dance classes and see which lessons she's going to so there's a friendly face; fri-sat-sun I have things (fri/sat have practice dances and the next round of improv starts Sunday). And that'll help but not enough; today I just spiraled down into a rut of how unfair this is and how I'm being taken advantage of.
Eh. I'm at a point where good days really outnumber the bad. But still feel horribly alone, and I still don't do any social things outside of structured events like classes. May have to try a few "platonic dates" (it's not that I don't have guy friends, but they're mostly work associates and we just don't do things outside work).
This sure still [censored]. Just because it's getting better doesn't mean it doesn't suck!
