I'm not sure, Herb... but you might want to check out piecing... both of you appear to be willing to work on the M, so there might be some ways to broach the "talks" and break them into manageable portions...
And you're right... one good talk is not the end... many, many, many one good talks will start the ball rolling in a good direction, we hope...
Portions of the bigger problem are first, the BIG problem... the M and making it work... so small chunks of that... and then portions of each of those "bigger" problems being reduced into small little baby steps... mapping it out may or may not help to be clear in working on each specific portion, otherwise conversation could be all over the place...
I don't know... I haven't pieced and frankly don't expect to, but that's how I understand the process...
And I think we can "man up" and still show that we're vulnerable... owning our mistakes are good... so long as you aren't owning hers... and I'm sure she'll own hers if she sees them...
