My brain has been churning about seeing XW as one of my matches last night, but after a lot of swimming I'm getting tired.
Let's see, in no particular order.
Seeing her on Match shows motorcycle guy was nothing or at least whatever it was is over.
She told the girls after we split that she'd never remarry and then that she'd never even date. Now she's on a dating site. So loneliness is setting in.
She's an extremely shy and withdrawn person -- or at least the person I met was -- and joining a dating site, putting your face out there for all to see was difficult to me and I'm someone who isn't easily embarrassed so it had to be hard for her.
And finally -- from the 1 percent of my heart that will never give up -- she won't realize what she gave up until she gets back out there so in that respect this is a positive.
And the final finally, the picture didn't look good. Of course, she's never taken particularly good pictures. She never mastered smiling on demand. My best pictures of her are reaction shots when she didn't know a picture was being taken. She doesn't do fake happy well.
I'm not sure why that last point jumps into my head. I looked at the picture she posted for about 15 seconds. I wondered, if I didn't know her, would I email her?
Had D8 go to a friend's house for the day. D12 had three friends over swimming. We are all tired now. Tomorrow is D8's birthday party. It is going to be a long, trying day. But it'll occupy my mind.
After this week, I don't have the girls for three weeks. I can catch up on work, meet with others about possible new careers and ... file for bankruptcy. I want that wrapped up by November. I want to be setting up all my finances for good by December and hit 2012 with a clean slate.
Me: 47, Ds 17-13, D final 6-11 http://tinyurl.com/yk4e2tz http://tiny.cc/thread2 http://tinyurl.com/ydtphqu http://tinyurl.com/thread4 http://tinyurl.com/3sm78k6 http://tinyurl.com/thread6
