Can I save my marriage? (long; please be patient)

[GAL Man]

Following on from what country posted, I posted something like below on johnnie1 thread, hope it can help

DETATCH, DETATCH, DETATCH

Bloody hard, but you MUST DO IT, or work to it. Do not try to do it, do it....... Trying presupposes failure, so as Yoda says, "no, try not, do or do not, there is no try"

Let go of what you have no control over, you control YOU. Ask yourself these questions (these are some of the ones I asked myself)

1) Who is mgm?
What I mean by this is not the person you had became, not the person you were at the end of the marriage, and not the person you portray now, but who is the real mgm, what wonderful traits did you have when you first met W, what makes you tick. Think who you really are. You are a lot more confident deep down aren’t you.

2) Acceptance (this is just the start of this one!)
Recognise your faults, how you contributed to the failure of the marriage. Acknowledge them, accept them and own them. Learn from them, but don't dwell on them. Only then will you be able to forgive yourself and others and move forward.

3) What do you want? (Different to need, but some may be the same)
You only get one chance at life, and most experts say one major f up/mistake. What do you want out of life? What makes you happy? Where do you want to be? What vision do you have for this? How will you get to this vision?

4) GAL
How can you enjoy life, think of activities on your own, with friends etc etc etc

Do what works, do not do what does not work, like the books and good peps here say

Say to yourself over and over to start believing it, “no matter what happens I can handle it”