... We joked around on text a little bit more. She asked when I was coming home and asked if we could go out to run errands together. I said sure.
...We kept joking and playing around, she made me a wonderful dinner, then we went out to explore our new surroundings. While at a store she suggested we get some condoms. (because the change in medications, and all the stuff going on with her system we thought it be a better idea to protect against pregnancy).
...It was nice to know she reopened that window.
...One thing I did notice was that she wasn't wearing her wedding band. Was a little disappointed, but what can I say
...Don't know yet if she'll sleep on the couch or not
....Gives me hope she'll come back, but I don't know that yet. If she doesn't not going to make a big deal or acknowledge it. I need to let her come back on her own.
I also made a point to myself to not hint at ml even after having bought stuff for it. I appreciate the gesture, but I guess for the time being she needs to initiate. It's night here, I hope she decides to come back to our bed.
I am so glad the roller coaster is in a happy place at the moment.
As to the condom's that was her saying she loves you and that she wants the two of you to be responsible. (Very mature on her part very traditional values on her part.) Even if they aren't put to use right away, she is telling you that she loves you and views you as "her" sexual partner, focus on that.
As to the wedding ring, don't read too much into it. It could be her fingers are swollen and she is afraid of not being able to get it off.
My wife no longer wears her engagement ring and that makes me feel bad. She says is because after over 40 years, it is so worn that she is afraid of the diamond falling out and the band wearing through and falling off. I have offered to take it to a jewler to be rebuild, but she says that would ruin it and its symbolic importance to her. Her not wearing it still upsets me, but I have learned to live with it and tell myself that she has reasons she doesn't and I should just focus on other things.
As to waiting for her to initiate, I would be careful, but there are things that you can do.
The most important thing is to understand that she is probably really confused about sex with you and she is probably as afraid of it not going well as you are, maybe more so. It is critical that you not express anger to her about a lack of sex or her refusing to respond to any attempt by you of initiating sex.
While rejection hurts, you need to be above that for the time being. You need to show her love (in my opinion) and not demand from her either physical or emotional love, but accept the gifts of love she gives you and let her know that her jestures of love are appreciated.
There is nothing wrong with you holdering her, touching her in a loving and comforting way and if she responds indicating that you would enjoy loving her physically. If the two of you get playful, you can even in a low-key teasing way ask out if she would like to try out the new drugstore toys the two of you purchased. Keeping it low-key and not emotionally threatening may be important to her.
Of couse all this advise is just my projecting my experience on your situation. Your situation is different. What will work or not work for your wife is for you and her to determine. Good luck to the both of you. I wish you the best.
>43 years of marriage--My wife and I are now closer than we have been in decades. I believe that my SSM is over.
