She basically said that my W isn't trying for sh!t. And that what I can do is address my issues for my "next" relationship.
There isn't much she can do for us.
I got home and the impact of my session kind a hit me hard. I realized that my feelings of love for my W are gone. She's this nice friend who lives in my house.
My M is DOA. There won't be a new one resurrected. the only thing I can do is how to figure our how to deal with her for the next 40 years.
I am done, really. I don't know how these guys can hang on for years. It's been about 8 months since the initial bomb and frankly, we are about as far apart now as then.
She is completely unwilling to even try. It makes sense. She doesn't love me, I can see that and I can feel that. I'm not stupid. I've just been fooling myself into thinking that she might have those feelings buried or could get those feelings back.
Every hug or kiss from a month ago was pure pity, PURE PITY.
The lunch last week and spending 15 of alone time, is just a courtesy, really.
She barely makes any time for me at all. Her work friends get more attention from them. She went all out for her Bosses (Female) birthday. I doubt she'd put the energy into something like that for me.
Heck, for father's day she could barely muster a card.
She's selfish, inconsiderate, moody and has been her whole life. Her family knows this. Her friends know it. Her whole EA is a perfect example of that. I mean I was in distress last year and possible suicidal. What does she do? The one thing I was worried about. Why? to make her feel better - our M, my feelings, our kids be damned.
Now I have to figure out how to navigate the situation until I can move out. It will be tough.
Since there is no section for the still married, but not filing, not piecing, not whatever. I will be taking a little break from here.
Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet. --Jean Jacques Rousseau.
