I find it disturbing that I am having to defend myself to people on this board (as are others that are posting on my thread that are determined to stand for one reason or another) as to my faith. I have avoided (I hope successful) before this post, to make any type of comments about others decisions.
I have respected their decision even if I disagree with their choices. And now, I (and others) find myself being criticized for my "interpretation" of scripture, as if mine is any less valid. Now, if I cherry-picked scripture without reading the bible and ignored other scripture that is before and after specific verses, that would still be up to me, however, I have the personality where I cannot accept the easy way out.
I do have a theory, which I hope I am wrong, in that it is possible that others are having issues with my stand (and the stand others have mentioned on this thread) because they feel as if they would be "less" if they have either decided to "move on" or may decide to move on later.
This is the part that is going to tick off a lot of people on this site. I am a big believer in DB techniques but one that I have to say is not part of the "technique" is the part of dating. Michelle has not condoned dating others. She talks about getting a life meaning finding ways to "live" while your S is off on their journey. It isn't good for anyone to sit around, moping, waiting for their S to come back. In fact, doing for others, charitable programs, physical activities, etc is excellent.
If you are dating, and still married, I have avoided making a comment. It is none of my business. If I am not dating, it is none of yours.
You have no idea if I am generally happy or sad. If I post something here about my kids and my concerns, I am simply sharing what is happening. I don't mind advice. Some of it is very good. The challenge is that many people are ready to give advice without learning more about the situation before they speak. Also, since this space is devoid of face-to-face conversation, much of the detail around someones life is sketchy to say the least.
And...some people are in their situation for a reason and are taking out their aggressions or what has happened to them out on another person, being harshly critical.
I know that this is probably upsetting a number of people but I have swallowed my frustration and bitten my tongue numerous times while, in the meantime, people are hitting me with unneeded (and full strength) 2x4s.
I don't know if it was directed toward me or someone else on my thread but I was completely surprised when someone questioned the strength of their faith. I haven't questioned others faith here and I really find it disturbing when a person is questioned who have made learning the bible a priority.
About DBing, I try to apply the principles of DBing to other R in my life as well. I find myself having to bend over backwards here as well, trying to avoid offending someone in return.
