Can My Marriage Be Saved, Pt 2

[~¤DG¤~]

You know, I'm not quite sure how to handle that.
I would think only speaking to him when absolutely necessary.
Now don't confuse that with having an attitude towards him. Be cordial, act "As if"

[a girl]

He told me today he's going to call OW. If she's working on her marriage, he'll step out. If not ... And of course I know she'll come running back.

Funny how he cares more about her family than his.

[a girl]

He's out looking at a rental. It's only a couple minutes away, which will be good for S. Hopefully it works and he can just go soon. Can't take much more.

He's taking the car (big SUV, I don't want it), so I've been researching cars. I think I'm going to get a Honda Civic Sedan. I want something smallish and economical, but it needs to have heated seats - it gets cold here!

When he asked, I told him I was going with a friend fro work to look at cars. He seemed to want more info, but I didn't offer it - he doesn't get to know things about me anymore.

Good to have something to focus on other than my misery.

We usually carpool to work - thinking I will take the train starting next week.

[a girl]

2x4s, I don't know.

He was in the living room and he was talking about the house he looked at and how it wasn't ok - "It's not .. I can't ... S can't be there. I can't have him at a place like that."

And he was so sad, and I .. I just went over and hugged him and said, "I don't hate you." He hugged me back for a while.

And then I left and I'm back to trying to just be polite and get through the next two weeks. But I feel weak. Why should I comfort him through the pain he's causing me?

[~ kd ~]

Why should I comfort him through the pain he's causing me?

Because you're human. You showed compassion in a moment... and as you have... just move on and forward...

[~¤DG¤~]

I don't think a 2x4 is necessary.

[a girl]

He's leaving this afternoon for an overnight fishing trip. It will be nice to not have to deal with .. him. Talking to him, being around him, seeing him.

I keep telling myself I can make it a couple more weeks until he's out. I'm civil but not chatty - not rude at all. Hopefully I can keep that up.

[a girl]

Just some journalling to keep me sane.

He's been diligently house-hunting all weekend. We talked briefly - he was worried I would think he was "cherry picking" and trying to find things wrong with the houses so he didn't have to go. I told him no, I didn't - I just wanted to make sure he found the right place for S, since S would be there. He looked/sounded sad while we talked about it.

He also sent me a mail telling me he knows I don't want to talk to him unless I have to, so he won't initiate conversation with me, and will assume if I initiate it with him, it's an exception, and not an invitation to start talking to me again. That said, he's still initiated several conversations. Again, I'm cordial but not warm. I did bless him when he sneezed, because I'm not rude.

I was in the kitchen making lunch, and he came in and said, "Oh, did I make a mess? Do I need to clean something up?" I was like "No, just .. making lunch." He also folded/hung up all my laundry that was in the dryer.

A bit after that, S was talking to me and was particularly cute, and he called, "S, you're so cute. I love you, boo."

I don't know if what he's leaving is starting to sink in, and I'm not going to start wondering/hoping, but it is interesting behaviour.

[~¤DG¤~]

It kind of sounds to me like he's rubbing salt into the wound a little bit.

It sounds like your handling everything as well as can be expected in this situation.
It will be hard once he's gone for sure, but it will also be easier.

[a girl]

Dropped him off for his overnight fishing trip. He's going with the husband of my best friend (probably would call him his best friend), who is a huge family man and can't believe what H is doing.

However, I'm sure all the conversation will just be H defending why I'm a person he needs to leave, how it wasn't an affair because our relationship "was over" and how S will be better off with parents who live apart, blah blah blah.