Last nite when XH and OW came to fetch my sons, I went out of my house and handed my kids over with a brief little conversation with XH and OW. Nothing too much but it was certainly an improvment on staying in my house cowering behind the door.
We just had a little laugh about how my S11 had grown and is eating me out of house. Also S8 has hurt his hand and was wearing bandage. He doesnt have to wear a bandage as it is nothing drastic but he wanted so I said to XH in afrikaans as my S8 was near us and I didnt want him to hear or understand that S8 was fine and was just wearing the bandage as it made him feel better. It was just old habit as before if we wanted to talk about things that the kids didnt need to hear we would talk in Afrikaans. Anyway of course OW was standing next to XH and she doesnt speak it so didnt understand and got a really funny look on her face. I know that this is smug but I thought - huh you see something that still ties XH and I together that you cant be a part of it.
It really was so unintentional and just happened and of course XH interpreted it for her. But I did feel a little smug about it. It was totally not planned and so was just a bonus to the whole situation.
Anyway it seemed to make my sons feel a little more comfortable which was my full motivation. It is amazing what you can do when your kids need you.
It felt great and I wasnt nervous at all. I felt in control of the situation again and that I had reclaimed my house again.
It felt fantastic sending my kids off for the weekend with a smile and a big hug. It also seemd to chip away just a little bit more of the bitterness and anger.
Consequently Child Support was paid this month not only on time but a day early. Something that has never happened before.
Feeling on top of the world today!!!!
Me 37 years young!! S11 S7 T22 M14 D final 13.05.2010 Today is the first day of the rest of my life!!! First post: D Day has arrived
