Yup. When she tells you such things, mainly she wants to see that you really heard her. The way to prove you did is by letting her know you understand the complaint and then CHANGING THE THING SHE IS COMPLAINING ABOUT.

Saying you are sorry is way over-rated in my opinion. The main reason is because most people who apologize are doing it for selfish reasons: to placate the person they are apologizing to and get them to stop being mad at you. Apologizing to someone who knows you really well is particularly ineffective: they will see right through it. Especially if you have a track record of apologizing and then continuing to screw up in the same manner. "He is not truly sorry, he is just saying it to shut me up." Invariably you will prove this to be true the very next time you repeat the behavior. "See, I knew he wasn't sincere". This paints you as lacking integrity, not truly caring enough to change, and not being a man of your word / someone she can rely on.

Who would you trust more, someone who makes promises and then fails to keep them (words over actions), or someone who never makes promises, but is always coming through for you when you need them when you need them to and without having to be asked (actions over words)?

Validating her concern and correcting the problem is far more powerful a message than just trying to convince her you regret your previous actions.

Spellfire aka Mike

"Women do not like controlling men. They respect and are attracted to men who control themselves. They ultimately are repelled by men who allow themselves to be controlled." -S&A