I'm at the same place, d1, and almost the same timeline. It's wretched. I've gone almost totally dark and it's not helped much. The no-fault state laws mean she'll be walking away with a TON; the only chance I would have is to convince her to take less, but not only is that not likely I don't even know how to talk with her now.
So I'm just battening the hatches and riding it out, I guess. Work on yourself as others have said. This is the cruelest joke life has ever played on me, and you probably feel the same way.
I've talked to enough people to know it gets better, and I can even see glimmers of it. But man--it's hard to believe when it feels like you're walking around with a lead fist clutching your heart.
