Finding me......

[Albuquerque]

I was defensive in my responses. But .........

Anytime you say anything, followed by but....you need to take a closer look at what you're really saying. There is a big difference between being defensive in your responses, and being on the defense with your actions. I think Walking had a good point about getting more bees with honey. You don't have to be negative and acrid in your statements in order to be firm about what you want. It's a fine line yes. Instead of repeating over and over that you want a mediator, when your H disussed the arrangements again you could have said "Hi H, I think it's great we will able to get something more defined for S sake. Do you have an appt set up yet with a mediator yet so we can take care of this ASAP?" Telling an MLCer "I will always do what's best for S" can, in an MLCer's mind be considered an attack and a threat. It can be seen as saying, " you don't do what's right for S, I do, and I will make sure he stays with me as much as possible". I know you didn't mean it that way. It's unfair, but we often have to watch the way we say things lest things go ridiculously awry. Just be careful. Texts can be saved forever and can come back to bite you in the butt....