You are 100% correct in your analysis, and I appreciate it (2x4 gratefully received). It certainly is not fair to the other person. I believe I've received more therapy recently from my recent hiking trips and fishing than I have from anything else. Perhaps it is time just to get another dog and put the R thing on the shelf for now! :-)
I would not say I have entered MLC (far from it, and I believe I know the difference by now). I would only say that the stages / journey of the LBS tends to mirror / mimic that of the MLC'er.
My dilemma is based on confusion of what to do, where to go, and why I'm still standing for this M. I now know the answer to all 3 of these questions. Always did, and that I was I have stood for my M all along. I just needed to listen to that little voice in my head. That's what I appreciate about this board ... perspective.
Again I realized today just how OK I will be any which way my sitch ends up. The fear of the unknown is often unfounded and causes one to make assumptions and pursue actions one will later regret. So often the best strategy is just to hold you cards, and don't be too concerned about the other players. Just watch the MLC as an interested observer, but don't join in. Live your own life. Be not concerned about the life direction of others (W - especially).
I said once in reponse to Cadet that "I did not need this date, I wanted this date". Not so sure either works for me anymore. I hear my kids playing in the yard and all I care is to see them viewing me in the best possible light, to know I am still their loving stable dad, their rock who cares for them and will be there no matter waht. This is what matters to me most. My W has made her regrettable choices. I do not care to repeat history.
