I guess I am now an official member of the DB club

[Woodman]

Kaffe Diem thanks for reading my story.
GAL - Connecting with old friends that I used to work with. Been retired for awhile. Making plans with them for lunch/happy hour. Walking for 45' to an hour every evening.
Bought some new clothes since I have lost some weight. Hit the tanning booth. Trying to not just sit at home and mope.

180's Now that's tough. She has gone dark as much as I have and so it is hard to see any radical changes. I have been controlling in the past, but had really tried to stop doing it when I understood what it was doing to her during the Love Dare. Between January and May I did smother her. Mainly because I had not regained any trust with her. I think Trust takes a long time. I had little problem forgiving her for the A, but living in a small town, with the guy living 2 blocks away and going to our Church really kept things churned up. I had become something of a couch potato over the last couple of years. I think because I felt defined by my job and when I no longer had a job, I no longer had much value. I think she lost respect for me. I wish that she could see that this has really been a wake up call for me. I'm ready to get up and do something not just sit on the couch waiting to get old and die.

Love Dare - She knew I was doing it. She was not excited and did not have much positive reaction to it. I finished it on December 10. When we reconciled on January 4, I let her read the journal that I kept while I was doing the Dare. She cried for 2 solid days and kept saying, "I can't believe I treated you so badly!" As the book says, "the Dare never ends" and I really felt like I was getting better and better at it during the spring. I felt like she was appreciating the changes that I had made. That is why it was such a shock when she just got up one morning and left with barely an explanation.