I can take that punch!

[Redo]

I guess i am trying to pick my brain as to what my wife said on saturday. One thing she said which i felt was important.

Last fall i started seeing IC because i knew that our marriage was failing and i knew that all my 'withdrawal' was contributing to it. At one point wife wanted to speak to my IC. I was happy to hear that, thinking that if she heard the honest opinion of the IC, then she would know that i was trying to become better. Looking back, it was a huge mistake. my IC did not like that idea, but i told her i was okay with it and that she had my 'OK' to discuss any details with my wife.

I guess what IC told wife was that due to my childhood issues i was having a hard time figuring out myself. So it would take 'a while' before i started understanding wife and where she was coming from. Even saturday, she told me that this convo with my IC swung her to quit the marriage because she knew that i would never understand her 'issues'.

I do agree 100% with IC assessments. I always had a problem understanding myself. My emotions, my reactions. Combine that my ethnic background where people do 0 introspection and regard visiting IC as 'crazy', I was at a disadvantage with my wife. But that was the whole reason to start seeing an IC so i could get out of the mess.

Sometimes when i try to see the situation from her POV, i can see why gave up. But then again sometimes i feel that we just gave it a lil more time. But then again i wonder if i am being selfish...

I know. No point crying over spilt milk. Bad day today for me. Gotta get back on my routine track. Have not even started studying for my exam on Aug 5th!! Yikes!