She says that she needs to figure out what she wants. It's extremely hard to not dwell on what she's doing or who she's with. I was in a motorcycle accident 20 years ago next month and i would take going thru that ordeal 100 times over this one, in a heartbeat!! I understand i can't stop her from doing what she wants when she wants, i really do. But it doesn't make it any easier.
I asked her not to date when she said she was going to. Told her that we could date and start anew and rekindle our relationship. That didn't go over very well. As f'ed up as it may sound i can forgive my wife. She got mad last week because i hadn't texted her in two days, said i was ignoring her. I was like you can text me too you know. It hurts like a son of gun. I hate it more and more everyday.
As for the family vacation i'm really looking forward to it. Along with playing roller hockey i'm gonna start doing P90X and get my body looking really good for the sunny weather in Fla. Hopefully that will spark some interest from her and that's also one of my 180's, getting into better shape. I don't want to ruin the vacation by bringing a lot of drama and BS to it. Especially for D8. Her sister has gone several times with her dad, she's my SD, and D8 is soooo excited about going.
I did say to my W that we could use the vacation for a new start, to show her that we can be good together and that i am changing. That may not have been the right thing to do or say.
