Keep in mind Tad, this is how she "feels". That's not the same as truth. Figure out what is real and what isn't if you can, and leave the rest on the ground.
For example:
Quote:
Accused me of controlling every situation
Said I had two chances to convince her to stay but I blew them
Said she doesn't know me anymore
Really? So although she doesn't know you, she does think you are controlling, brainwashing, etc.? I think you picked up on the conflict, no? You started to in some of your retelling...
Does it hurt? Yes. But likely only because you are upset that you did not get the wake up call you were hoping for. You won't. You cannot guess if she is done or not either. I read much into what she said (via your retelling) that tells me she is just as confused as before.
She'll never trust somebody again yet she needs somebody in her life? Really. Huh. Does that make sense to you Tad? I doubt it.
That said, you cannot guess what or when she will be feeling anything. Stop trying to do that and focus on you. My guess is that she does see the changes because accused you of that later when she said you changed too little too late.
I point that out because it means you may want to consider staying the course, no?
For what it's worth, I think we've all heard the same from our spouses. Some of them verbatim. You are not alone amigo.
The accusations are not about you, Tad. Much of that is projection from what I saw. Some is likely based on valid stuff and all of it simply how she feels. Shake it off as such.
Oh. The friends question? I think you are looking at it backwards. You think the friends influenced her decision? How about another perspective? This clue-by-four is given out of loving kindness: what if she sought out friends that would give her that advice instead of having friends first who happened to give out the advice? Perhaps several old friends said something different and were summarily excused? Just making sure you realize you cannot figure out what you are seeing like that. You don't have the information my friend.
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
