7 weeks to exH marries OW

[lea74]

Thanks kat. This makes absolute sense. My xH stills feels he didnt do anything wrong and never had an A. How is it then that they were engaged 7 weeks after the D was finalised and they were living together before the D was finalised. He has justified it all to himself and it seems to his family as well and has not taken any responsibility at all for his part in the break down of our marriage.

I recognised what was going wrong and did a lot of work to save our M. My xH even recognised that and said he felt guilty that I was doing all the work. He was never interested in any MC.

In his mind he is happy and therefore everyone else should be. He even told my S8 that the reason he left because he wasnt happy. How do you tell your son that you werent happy living with them - what a huge burden to pass on.

My xH said that he loved me, just wasnt in love with me. Oh really - well you know what there were times I didnt even like him, but that is called life and M and you work your way through those patches. I took my marriage vows seriously - I guess his should have been 'until things get tough then I will leave and move on.'

My xH is under the impression that everyone is ok - that our sons are doing great and are very happy for him and cant wait to have a new 'mummy'. My s8 tells me that he doesnt have a life, he doesnt know the point of it. He feels as though we are not a complete family and we have a whole in it. Unfortunately they do not feel confident enough to tell him the truth. They physically have to psyche themselves up when he comes to get them and he doesnt see any of this. They run out the door hugging and kissing him and this is all he sees. I however have to pick up the pieces on sunday nite when they return. In addition, due to my persistance and not letting them use the D as an excuse they are both doing well at school. I also make sure that they take part in clubs, (for which I do all the driving around and paying fees) and also make sure that they have an active social life attending playdates, youth clubs etc. So yeah I guess to the untrained eyes everything looks great. Unfortunately I think the damage of how this has all worked out and the way the D was processed will only become visible in some years when I have some teenagers on my hands.