It never used to be that way, although I have always talked openly about my feelings. She has become more withdrawn over the years, thats where she is more like a man emotionally. I suspect that it has to do with a childhood incident of touching when she was younger, in addition to her home daycare crisis, midlife crisis (being a mother so young) and her dissatisfaction with me. She tried to tell me about the abuse once, but I asked not to know who it was because that was easier for me. (what a jerk). I think she needs to deal with that in therapy for her own sake.
She has a pattern even before me, of cheating on every boyfriend she ever had. I naively thought that she wouldn't do that if she was bound by matrimony. When we first started dating it started as friendship but quickly progressed to sexual... REALLY GREAT SEX. She had tried to break it off with me a few times during that period, but the breakup sex pulled us back together. Come to think of it, I suppose I did do DB techniques even back then... It was when I gave up on her and let her go, and we were just friends, that she came back to me. GOD what I would give for some of that breakup sex now! (don't worry, Sandy, I won't act on that... Or should I... JK). I remember thinking how jealous I was back then of her boyfriend at the time having sex with her, but I told myself that I didn't care and moved on dating other women... I'm sure that she was jealous seeing me with other women and that scared her that she would lose me. (made her wonder back then...) How do I do it now?...
Also, to answer your questions about the parental situation... her mother is a very emotionally closed person. Her father, just like me, very open. I love her parents. Her parents live about 8 hours away from us. I think she resents the fact that mine are only 20 mins away. Naturally we see my P more than hers. I do rely on my P due to my visual disability. I also believe that it is important to have a strong familial bond, she does not share my views, as both sets of her grandparents and family's lived far away, and had little contact.
Personally, I think she is keeping everything from her parents because she knows what their reaction will be. I can see how wrong it was for me to "tell on her to her sister". I wish I could undo that. I asked her sister to keep it confidential, and she agreed. Sooner or later, I will have to answer for the calls to her sister and OM.
Me 45 W 34 W.A.W. 3K. D11 S9 D6 M 12 y T 13 y Bomb drop 02/22/2011 2nd written bomb (Letter bomb) 05/31/2011 Affair (A bomb) revealed 07/03/2011
