You need to excercise everyday. You need to start feeling good somehow inside. Your contacts are a start. But you need to start moving forward. Force yourself everyday whether you want to go or not. Whether you are defeated or not. Go. Go. Start lifting weights. Start running...
Buy some new clothes. Change your look. I grew a goatee...You know a woman at worked noticed and said it looked good. You have no idea how a little compliment changes you. This is about working on you. Whether it works out or not, this is time to make a better you. For you and for your kids. If she comes back great, if she doesn't you are working down the path of recovery.
Look, I tried to voulenteer, I bought a guitar, I went to see a priest...I tried it all. I too lived with my W.A.W. for almost a year. Hell on earth. I slept on the couch. I would not subject myself to humiliation sleeping in the same bed any longer. Pining for someone is unattractive. She won't see you as attractive if she sees this guy trying so hard to win her back. Detaching is the only way you make it through this. Stop trying for her and try for you.
You are entering the hardest part of your life. Go see a therapist as well if you haven't started already.
Remember: it took a long time for your marriage to get to this state, it isn't going to change back the other way overnight. You also don't want to be a charity case. For her to stay out of guilt or duty isn't good. It needs to be about love.
The only way out is through...
Join a gym tomrrow and start.
Remarried 6 mo S 12 S 13 S 16 SD 12 SD 16 SD 17 SS 19
