Starsky, I totally see your point on this. I will clarify her choice of options. I will re establish that boundary. But remember if she chooses to have a private life, then i have to suck it up and as Mr. Bond says, continue to change her attitude and thoughts about me.
I honestly dont think my wife sees me as a weak person. I have a very shady past. One that often involved physical violence for money. OM is a toothpick geek. She has done everything she could to keep him away from me.
Over the past 14 months, i have proven that i have the strength to restrain myself, i have grown as a father and honestly, as a husband. She sees that and her actions show that she recognizes my changes. She admitted that she is living 2 lives, and its killing her. She doesnt want OM near our children now, and when my deadline came, she still didnt want him near the kids.
These are all baby steps, but when i add them together, it is some pretty big steps.
I will keep adjusting and improving myself. The attraction is coming back, i can feel it. She is spending 4 days a week at my house with me and the kids as a family, she is staying here on her weekends. I make sure i am always around being the new me. If it gets to emotional or tough for me, i just take a break. I go to my room and read a book, or come on here and read.
I know it wont be easy, but i think i will continue this direction until it stops working or i cant handle it emotionally. But i do have some good friends who let me vent and say totally crazy things and they support me and even point out things that i can improve on and how to do things differently. I value all of you guys, and i appreciate you taking the time to read my storey and give me input.
