Can I "fake" GAL?

[Very Confused]

Hello all,

I've been involved in my trial separation for 3 months now. In the middle of April, I sought out a separation and divorce support group as part of me GAL. The first 2 weeks were so wonderful. I was socializing, getting out of the house several nights a week, making new friends with people I thought would understand what I was going through. Fast forward a couple of months and I have had to cut all those people out of my life because of DRAMA, what I like to call text message terrorism, inappropriate male advances and propositions. Ugh. I'm doing other things to GAL, like doing things for myself, but the social aspect of my life is severely lacking again. I moved last year to a new city and don't have any friends or family here. I have a few work friends, but they are all happily married and/or have kids.

My H knew I was out doing things all the time and it really seemed to improve our situation. He calls and texts more, he visits, we even ML the last couple of times we saw each other. This is huge to me because one of his love languages is physical touch and one of his big points for walking away was his lack of attraction to me. Now my question is, can I still hint at doing things with friends, even though I'm really not? I don't want him to think I'm just sitting at home all the time, even though that's what I am really doing.

Before anyone gives me a 2x4, I just do not have the desire to let more new people in to my life at this time. It's stressful and I have such a bad taste in my mouth from the support group so called "friends" I made.

I tried going to see a psychologist last week and it was a disaster. She said that not initiating contact was ridiculous and that I should be putting myself and my feelings out there for my H. She hated the idea of DB'ing. She criticized my hairstyle and wanted me to get a full makeover and have my colors done. I walked out thinking that maybe I should start contacting my H more..but me not initiating has been working for the most part so far, but she really made me feel like I was approaching my whole separation wrong. I'm so confused right now!

Today was our 6 year anniversary of dating and he didn't call me or text today. That really hurt after him contacting me 6 out of 7 days last week. I absolutely have not detached or dropped the rope. I was doing great before,then on June 1, he came over and we ML. It all changed from there. He prefaced any physical contact by saying he didn't want it to give me false hope. I agreed, but in hindsight, I see that is exactly what happened. Whenever I see him, I get sucked right back in to the cycle. I try to rationalize it because we are in a trial separation and he is still undecided on whether or not he wants a divorce.

Both of our lease renewals are due at the end of July and I'm beginning to panic about what is going to happen with us. Any and all advice is welcome..thanks.